LOVE..........

LOVE, the most powerful force in the universe! Without it, we have nothing.  It's not just the love of a soul-mate that we desire so much, it's the love of friends and family that really make our worlds go round.  I have put so much emphasis on health and how blessed you should feel if you have yours in tact, but really it's the LOVE that matters!  So don't be afraid to love generously.  By our age, we've all been hurt (scarred for life) but you can't live in the past and allow those scars to dictate your future.  You have to learn to forgive and move on or you just end up caging yourself in and not experiencing the true love God intended you to give and receive.

I was recently reminded of my own scars.  I've been deeply hurt, betrayed and it took me years to recover from it.  Those are lost years, but I'm open and happy now and you should be too!!  I'm blessed to have Tim who I truly believe is my soul-mate.  He's so good for me, to me and with me.  We laugh a lot together!!  He calls me out on my bullshit and won't let me run away when things get challenging.  He's being an absolute angel on this journey, where I think most men would have moved on and said, "I didn't sign up for this journey".  I'm proud to be with Tim, he's a good man with a huge heart of gold!!!!!!! and tons of love to give and I have tons to give him back.

You don't realize how much your friends really love you until you get in such difficult times and they just rise to the occasion.  I know my cancer has touched each friend differently.  All of you have responded in your own unique way, yet the depth of your love if the common thread and I feel beyond blessed to have so many friends that care and love me so much.  I hope I am as good a friend to you as you are to me.  It's THAT love from friends that has kept my world in a beautiful place and kept me incredibly happy! 

Since losing my mother in 1999, my heart opened up to more people.  It just takes a lot more people to fill the void she left behind.  She was my best friend, so back then my social circle was smaller because I had her so much of the time and she was such a big part of my life.  Her absence sent me many many new angels that I get to now call friend.  Because my family is so far away, I have come to think of my friends as my family.  They feel the same to me, that's how tight the bond has become.  How blessed is that?????????

We only have so much time here and now, so love deeply, passionately, and generously!  I think the more you love the better and happier your life will unravel into a beautiful life.  Holding back out of fear of pain, is just preventing the true bliss and joy that you can experience in this lifetime.  Like I said, we've all been hurt and if you are younger, then it's just a matter of time.  However, no matter how broken your heart may feel, it never stops beating, even though you may have those days when the pain is overwhelming and you want it to stop.  It doesn't. You move on and move on you must!

I am doing well.  I'm so fortunate to be breaking records and beating this thing called cancer.  I feel badly for those not getting the good news I get each week when I go in.  The daily grind of side affects is horrible but I can get through this journey with the love and support you all are giving me on a daily basis.  I have so much to look forward too!!!!  Like tasting food and not having my eyes watering like a faucet constantly.  I can't wait to look normal again. LOL  I'm anxious to not have metal mouth anymore, hopefully by Thanksgiving it will be mostly gone and I can taste my favorite holiday!!  My last chemo is scheduled for Nov. 3rd so I'm hopeful things will be getting back to normal weeks later. Not that Tim and I are making out like 9th graders on this journey, but I wonder if he taste the metal like I do LOL  Just a funny thought.

Live like your dying peeps and you'll be fine!!!!!!!!!!
LIVE WITH PASSION
DJ