Living on the edge

WOW..it has been a rough week.  I have been so tired and had more stomach discomfort than I could possibly put into words.  Dr P said one of his patients described after whipple surgery there is a new normal........it was at that moment I realized I will probably never feel normal again...........now I have to get aclimated to a new normal.
There are days where I feel on the edge.......by that I mean cancer can push me over or even chemo.  I can FEEL the edge within me.  As long as I look at the solid ground to stand on which for me is my family and the most amazing friends you could ever meet I know I wont fall off the edge.  Its a different life when you are made so aware of your expiration date.
I know that even if I live to be a hundred it wont be long enough to help and inspire the number of people I want to.  I am half way thru my book which I pray will help millions........I dont ask for much do I? Lol
I am here to tell you your life is short........there will never be a good time to die but every day you have a chance to live a great life and do great things so DO IT. 
Ruth yes you can share and use any part of my blog........it is here for everyone to share.  I hope your husband is on his way to a speedy recovery!!!  And thank you for your love and support.
I hope none of you grow as tired as I am on this journey.....it was hard enough the first time but this second time is on another magnitude.  I know in my heart God has put me on this path to help others.  Although God did not give me cancer I know he knows Im tough enough to do this twice or I would not be here right now.
My parents had to go back to Alabama so we now have the burden of scheduling...........getting someone to get me to and from chemo..............and yet to come daily radiation.  This is hard and I do wonder how other patients do it.  I of course hope I can drive myself but getting a daily push of chemo may not give me that option..........I am really learning so many ways I can help other patients once I am in remission.  This is a crazy cancer life I am living.
Much love to all of you..............YOU keep me going as I dont want to let any of you down.  You have so much faith in me and it gives me strength.
LIVE WITH PASSION!